LaserBlog.com

What did u do this weekend? On the 4th I was in the mood to do another one of those “day in the life” kinda things so I took a camera w/ me everywhere I go and just shot and shot and shot. I have yet to compose a “day in my life” webpage from those images yet, but I’m sure I will. We missed pro fireworks but our neighborhood had amazing ones! Between the people on the next street over and the next-door neighbors on both sides of us, we had an amazing (and fun) display! I took a ton of photos, they will be up soon, too.

I did nothing but veg all weekend, and now I am dreading tomorrow. I didn’t do ANY housecleaning, any web design, anything. It was nice, but now I have to clean, pick up, work on two websites, (but first workout then shower), pack up my Lomo film for mail-in to SnapFish, and more. I hate when there is alot of stuff looming over my head.

The most important priority is the web design, but if I do that first thing in the morning then I’ll never do my workout. But if I workout first, then they’ll be calling me to find out where I’m at and I hate getting those phone calls before I get a chance to do more work on the project.

What’s funny w/ web design, for me anyway, is those first few minutes where you are trying to get your bearings. I have not worked on a certain project in a few days, so I have to find the files, open them, open all my programs, figure out where I left off, look at my notebook for changes, etc. It’s the “settling in” part that I dread. Once I am immersed in software and know where I need to be going, I get on a roll and it’s then hard to stop, I’ll forgo meals and bathroom trips for hours because I don’t WANT to stop. But getting started, getting to that point, is the worst part. (for me, anyway)

I’m feeling better than I was on Thursday. I ended up feeling worse on Thursday before it was all over. Just so much stuff was bothering me, and then when I started talking about it more stuff came up. I just start thinking about all the people who have hurt me and it just gets to me. I know everyone has had bad stuff happen to them, but if you don’t stop and mourn once in a while, you just end up bottling it up inside and then it manifests itself in bad ways. I’d rather have one bad day once in a while then be mildy depressed all the time or just act like an asshole or emotional seesawy that nobody can stand to be around. I’ve spent time w/ people like that. So I had a day to “feel”. Now it’s over, thank god.

Don’t forget to do the “26 Things” photo scavenger hunt for July! I’m going to. It should be fun!

I don’t know what’s wrong w/ me today. I guess I feel depressed.

First I didn’t realize that the 4th of July was tomorrow. I hate these kind of holidays. I like christmas and easter and thanksgiving. But I hate the holidays that make the parks crowded, the roads crowded, close your sushi bar, and make other restaurants crowded. I love fireworks but I HATE crowds, I hate people, and I hate traffic, so I don’t go. Then I’m sad cuz I missed out. So realizing that tomorrow was the 4th really bumbed me out.

Then I took a shower and got dirty litter all over me. We got our second cat Crystal and she beats the shit out of our older SIXTEEN year old cat. It’s very violent. So the new cat lives in our bedroom and her litterbox is in our bathroom. It’s disgusting. But there are no alternatives. Litter is everywhere and even though I wear only socks or slippers I still get litter on me. It’s so unsanitary and I hate it and I’m really depressed about it.

Then a friend is having computer problems and I’m frustrated because I can’t help them.

Then my mom calls and as soon as I hear her voice I start crying for no reason. I just feel depressed and I have no idea why. I mean, I just listed “reasons” but it’s stupid: life is good: nobody is sick or dead, we have money and toys and nice cars and financial freedom to go out and do things, M is wonderful to me and I should have no complaints.

I just feel sad and I’m not sure if it’s just that “lack of control” over the litter problem or that I’m not keeping busy enough w/ my web-design business.

I need to go get a presecription for a problem I have been suffereing w/ but it’s thunderstorms all around and nothing makes me madder than getting wet so I’m here on the couch instead.

fuck, i’m in a bad mood.

Hahaha… great political cartoon: click here (link to MentalPutty.com)

Even more Canon D60 pix:

* Red Winged Black Bird
* Red Winged B.B. In Flight
* Brown Bird
* Misc Backyard pix; butterfly, etc.
* Misc Pix

Too much rain:

Oh my god I have uploaded A TON of D60 photos tonight. I had apparently forgotten to go through some of them as I was surprised to find them. So, here ya go:

* Silver is home from the vet-hospital.
* Flower pix from 3-17-03 that I forgot about.
* Misc pix from 3-28-03, leaves, etc.
* Nature Center pix from 4-19-03, neat animals and stuff.
* Nature Center pix from 4-19-03, neat plants and stuff.
* Misc pix including a bird eating a butterfly.
* Pix from the lake.
* Pix from the Slough; dragonflies, etc.
* Pix from the park